Catherine Kos – Author

One of the hardest things to remember, is that even on the rainiest of days, the sun still shines. I’m trying hard to remember that tonight. This short story… Has a lot of emotions. I hope it makes you feel something. Stay rad.

The song meant to be playing with this story a The Day the World Went Away by Nine Inch Nail.

Standing on the Line

She’d stood there for a while.
Not entirely sure how long, she just knew that the sun was starting to set, which meant another day was going to follow. Another morning of waking up and going to a job she didn’t want to go to. Another day of fake smiles and asking, ‘how are you?’ when she doesn’t care. Another day of mind-numbing work that doesn’t matter. At a job that could replace her in a heartbeat.
She stared past the edge of the building like she has for months, staring down at the tiny ants going to and fro, going on about their lives. It’s not that she wants to die; that’s not why she does this. It’s simply for her to breathe. This high up, with only the wind and her music, she feels like the weight is finally off her chest, and she can inhale deeply again. Only up here does she think, for once, content.
With her old, wired earbuds in, the song she was listening to ends, and another begins to place. She knows the music just by the beat at the beginning, and it sends goosebumps rippling across her skin. She feels her body sway from the wind, her eyes transfixed on the pavement below her.
And then the drums start. She closes her eyes, slowly leaning her head back to face the sky. She stretches her arms out wide as if to say, ‘I’m here, do what you will.’
The lyrics begin.
I’d listen to the words he’d say,
She’s not sure what they meant to the man singing, but to her, it was everything she couldn’t think to say out loud. Even if she decided to tell the truth, to honestly answer when someone asked how she was doing, she wouldn’t know what to say. Because she doesn’t even know what’s wrong. She has a sadness that has settled into her bones, taking root like a squirrel in a house, burrowing deeper until the last resort is to take it out.
All the insides left cold and grey.
Well, that just is her in a nutshell.
There is a place that still remains.
Once again, she lowers her head, opening her eyes to stare at the tiny little blobs that walk down below. She thinks about how if she were to fall, the sun would rise tomorrow. Another day would follow because she is just one life among many.
The wind blows hard, making her wobble as the last true line is delivered.
The day the world went away.
And the bass plays, sending a thrill through her.
She once again raises her head to the sky as another gust of wind hits her.
The song ends.
But tomorrow, the sun will rise again.